Mark Terrace
Duolingo Growing Worried about User Who Hasn’t Used App in over 15 Minutes
Burger King Launches Ozempic Burger
Miami, FL – Burger King today announced the launch of its new Ozempic Burger (TM), after trialling the product for months at select locations. "We've worked closely with Novo Nordisk"--the maker of weight loss drug Ozempic--"for a long time to craft the perfect weight
Trump Threatens Barron with 25% Tariffs if He Doesn't Get off His Phone
Emperor Penguin Has No Clothes
Thoughtful Boyfriend Orders Dessert He Knows Girlfriend Secretly Wants Him to Eat
Man Outraged That More People Aren't Outraged by Latest Outrage
Snowflake .38 Always Told It's Special
Woman Already Has True Crime Podcast Planned Out in Case Any Friends Get Murdered
Scottsdale, AZ – Sarah McHenry announced today that she knows exactly how she would produce a serialized true crime podcast if any of her friends were murdered. "I'd start in the middle of the story to really grab the listener," she said, "Probably beginning with a
Tourists Are Destroying Our City Says Man Who Just Defaced 500 Year Old Church
Odlaw Resents That Everyone Just Assumes He's Evil
Ancient Egypt – Hiding amongst a crowd of Egyptians busily constructing a series of pyramids, Odlaw could not hold back his anger. "Everyone just assumes because I dress like this I'm evil," he said, pointing to his distinctive yellow and black striped outfit. "For the record,
