Mark Terrace
Indignant Penguins of Heard Island Impose 10% Tariffs on U.S.
A rocky beach – The avian residents of Heard Island wasted no time in responding to news that the U.S. would be applying a 10% tariff to all imports from the uninhabited island. "Effective immediately, we are imposing a reciprocal 10% tariff on all U.S. imports," said
Baby Whose Parents Skipped Tummy Time Never Learns to Lift His Head
Trump Orders Gulf of Mexico Be Renamed Gulf of American Airlines
Washington – President Trump today amended his earlier executive order renaming the Gulf of Mexico, after selling the naming rights to American Airlines. Trump declined to share the financial details of the sponsorship, insisting only that it was a "beautiful deal, just beautiful." American Airlines released a statement saying
Defiant Trump Dons Braveheart Face Paint to Mark Liberation Day
Amish Scientists Announce Development of Self-Driving Horse
Mayor of Istanbul Arrested for Conspiring to Win Presidency
Istanbul – Ekrem İmamoğlu, the popular mayor of Istanbul, was arrested last week by authorities on charges of corruption and conspiracy. Specifically, conspiring to defeat President Erdogan in upcoming elections. İmamoğlu and his Republican People's Party surprised the ruling Justice and Development Party by winning recent municipal elections, and
Therapist Counsels Pac-Man that He Can't Just Eat His Way out of Every Problem
So-Called Italian Restaurant Doesn't Even Have Unlimited Breadsticks
Manic Episode Mistaken for Excitement about Deal
Judge Declares that Simply Being Aware of Facebook Makes You Subject to Their Terms of Service
Washington – Judge Anthony Carbassi today ruled against the plaintiff in McKensey v. Meta, declaring that Ms. McKensey was indeed subject to the Facebook Terms of Service, and therefore could not sue the company in court. McKensey had brought the suit after finding pictures of herself posted to the social network,
Putin Renews Ukraine War for Fourth Season
Moscow – President Vladimir Putin announced today that Russia would be renewing the "Special Operation" in Ukraine for a fourth season. "We have had many fruitful discussions," he said of his recent two hour phone call with the U.S. President Trump, "and decided that the