Hungover Teacher Announces that Today's Lesson is a Movie

Bethesda, MD – The students of Tod Hensen's 7th grade history class were treated today to a "multimedia lesson plan," according to sources close to the classroom. Their teacher, a 16 year veteran of the local school system, managed to get through a barely coherent explanation that

Experts Find that 3rd Grade Valentine's Day Card Still Most Effective Means of Finding Soulmate

Cambridge, MA – Researchers at MIT and Harvard today announced that Valentine's Day cards delivered to your classmates in 3rd grade remain the most effective means of finding the ideal romantic partner in life. "The evidence is clear," said Marieanne Joseph, one of the lead researchers. "

Market Report: Bird in Hand Now Trading at over 3.1 Birds in Bush

Man Really Puts Literature PhD to Full Use Finding Perfect Slogan for Anti-Lice Shampoo

Woman Takes Day off from Work to Process Celebrity Breakup

Scientists Theorize Traffic Lights First Evolved Bright Colors to Attract Mates

“I’m a Bit OCD” Says Man Who Usually Remembers to Wash His Hands after Using Bathroom

Garbage Truck Driver Feels Seen by Toddler

Tullahoma, TN – Don Jacobs, 51, a driver for the regional waste company was completing his usual route this morning when he noticed a young boy on the side of the road waving to him. "Naturally, I waved back," said Jacobs before pausing and starting to tear up. "

Surgeon General Issues Warning Against Consuming Yellow Snow

Donald Trump Promotes Colonel Sanders to General

Child Honestly Thought More Strangers Would Have Offered Them Candy by Now

New Safety Guidelines Require Children Use Car Seat until They Are at Least 7 Feet Tall