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Pabst Still Coasting off Award It Won 100+ Years Ago

Yoga Teacher Oddly Inflexible about Schedule

Vegans Protest Land of Milk and Honey

Teenage Twins Named Jane and Jan Totally Appreciate Joke

Jesus Clarifies He Loves You, He's Not in Love with You

Conservative Amoebas Protest Teaching of Asexual Education in Schools

Jurassic Park Zookeepers Unable to Contain Rampaging Metaphors for Hubris

Take-A-Wish Foundation Celebrates 45 Years of Sabotaging Children's Dreams

On Full Moon Cursed House Becomes Warehouse

Depressed Man Has Dog-Shaped Hole in Life
